Today I enjoy greater tranquility but I observe dormant dreams and storms.
It is true that while you imagine a different life, life, the real one, happens to you. I find it hard to let go of the moment that passes without ignoring the swirl of the brain.
Sometimes writing about it helps. Although, I feel more and more intolerant of the interminable patience to wait for who knows what day will come.
Meanwhile, time passes.
And you?
The power of trauma engraves events deeply in your memory. I can clearly see what’s around me, what my friend is saying on the phone and the images passing through an old TV set broadcasting live what was happening.
And it was 20 years ago.
The oldest memory I have in my mind is my mother giving her breast to my sister. And it was almost fifty years ago.
Fear and jealousy, two of the most powerful feelings a human being can feel are the strongest markers for memory.
What if we could exchange those toxic feelings with joy and happiness?
Yes, I remember the first kiss.
It shows when I keep on writing at night when my willpower is close to zero. I really don’t want to focus in the morning. That’s another Sunday spent with the sense of guilt of not having written, and ended up in a short and rushed post.
On the other hand I am recovering forces and releasing the pressure.
There’s only this little problem of time: August is almost over and societal norms would want me fresh and regenerated back to my place.
There are some things which make us happy. When we feel sad we should remember what those things are and plan to get them. When experiences are responsible for our mood then we need to plan for them to emerge. Remembering what made us happy means being self-aware. Writing down our mood in different contexts would represent the base research for us to understand better what we should aim to. Writing, daily journaling, reporting on experiences that had contributed to that self-awareness. Here is another scope where PKM can have a positive contribution to our mood and to make us happy. Keep track of places, people, tastes, happenings, events that left a positive mark on your memories and store them safely as the most precious ingredients for happiness recipes.
No. Not. Nisba. Nicht. Nada. Mai. No. No. No. I don’t want to write. No. This is a no.
I acknowledge the defeat of not willing to focus to write. So, no corrections, no second thoughts. This is coming as it is coming. It is free-flowing from my fingers without reflection. It flows now, naturally. And it will stay, permanently.
It’s a no. A denial. I am acknowledging it. I accept it.
No. Not today.
I wish.
When time is running out and you didn’t take advantage of it’s more than risky. You are risking more of no making it. You have already failed. You have failed in using that time smartly. You had to plan your time before its end. There is no planning and no thinking to do when time is scarce. Things are already decided. You cannot take your time when your time is taken.
I felt more comfortable hundreds of km away from home with a fast connection rather than at home with poor or no connection.
This is scary. Where is resiliency?
The availability of high-speed Internet connection shouldn’t affect my will and attitude to write my daily article. Pen and paper should be enough. But when I load my favorite text editor online, and I have to wait seconds because it’s available, I am already changing my mood.
It’s an addiction. And it’s not good for creativity. My goal is to publish a memorable daily article. Something I will find valuable in the future. I am not benchmarking all connectivity services as a profession. It would be nice to be more mature about that.
But slow Internet connection is really frustrating. It’s not helping at all.
So, here is my slowly written and slowly published article for today.
That’s another non-memorable one.
A virtual space to meet online becomes home when you are traveling. There are a lot of limitations in remote working in virtual offices. On the other hand, having a decent connection, a screen and a keyboard, immediately makes you feel at home. You hear and feel your distant colleagues in the same way you usually do, even from your real home. But you’re not in your house, your in another place, maybe alone, maybe with friends and family. And the weird thing is that it reveals being unusual to be working in the usual conditions while being in another place. It’s confusing but also stimulating, there is continuity that keeps your team together, regardless of where they are located in the world.